Dear Mom Luv:My mother is driving me crazy!
All I want is a little privacy. I feel trapped in a house with two brothers, my father and a mother who goes overboard to make sure their needs get met, but often neglects mine, leaving me to fend for myself.
I am a straight A student. I am going into my sophomore year of high school and I have never gotten into any trouble. Yet, my mother is always snooping through my things expecting to find something and every time I am on the computer, my dad in looking over my shoulder almost every 10 minutes - even when I am working on homework!
I don't have a boyfriend. I have a strict curfew of 11:30 p.m. And I work really hard to follow all their rules, but it seems to never be enough.Most times, my parents treat me like a prisoner and act like they can't wait to punish me for every little thing whereas my brothers (one younger, one older) seem to get away with everything - especially my older brother.
I am so sick and tired and I can't wait to go to college just so I can get out of this house.
In the meantime, could you please tell me how to survive this madness.
Thanks,
Going Crazy in Dallas
===============================
Dear Going Crazy:
First of all, you may feel like you are going crazy, but you really aren't. Next, let me tell you how proud I am of your academic accomplishments. Getting straight A's is not easy.
As it relates to your family. I know it is hard growing up as the only girl. But, with you having only three more years before college, you'll be graduating high school before you know it.
Consider talking to your mother - since she is the only other female in the house. You may have already tried this, but try doing it from a standpoint of her perspective. A lot of parents don't like to admit to their children some of the things they got away with when they were teenagers. This reality combined with all the additional dangers from online predators to teachers who can't always be trusted can sometimes make parents a bit overprotective. You must admit, parents do seem to have more to be fearful about these days than before. So, think about it, in some ways, can you blame them?Tell your mom you know that she and your dad love you. Acknowledge the hard work it takes to be parents of three children. Then ask her what is it that doesn't allow her and your dad not to trust you. Use your track record as a healthy bargaining chip to try to get a bit more privacy - although be careful not to throw it in her face.
Find a way to get further engaged in either school activities or a hobby or sport you really love like basketball or art - whatever interests you the most.
Don't give up on your parents. Because we are people like you, we aren't perfect either. But know they are committed to protecting you in your best interest. By approaching your mother, you'd be surprise how she might respond.
Let me know how it works out.
Peace.
8 comments:
Hi: There is an effect that happens with what I call closely guarded teens. Because I was a cloely guarded teen, even as a male, I know
this from my teen experience and from those of some of my peers.
I call it the slingshot effect. It happens when you have chafed under the sometimes overprotective guardianship parents are morally, legally and emotionally bound to provide to teens who, despite a very advanced system of information to inform them, have little or no practical experience living in the world. So what is the slingshot effect? Here is the best analogy I can think of:
Benny The Beagle watches the world from the big bay window of his owner's house. He is a well kept championship winning dog and is generally very happy except when it comes to wanting to be outside. He dreams of freedom. He hates being walked on the leash. When he is sitting in the window and other dogs come by he feels for all the world like a loser because he doesn't have the freedom to go where and when he wants.
One day the exterminator comes in and forgets to close the door properly. Bennie the Beagle sees his chance, dashes through the opening ans is out. He runs and runs and runs, sniffing everything he ever wondered about and generally having a great time. He is having such a good time running until he doesn't see the car until it's too late. The slingshot effect even affects animals.
Your parents have the enormous responsibity for you life, your safety, and your preparations for an independent life. Imagine the lifetime of torturous heartbreak they would feel if you became one of the 3,000 young people who are reported missing in America daily!
Now, imagine having the slingshot effect put you on a collision course with a psycho you met on the web!
Imagine that you decided to go meet this guy, who seemed very nice, very understanding online but when you met him he kidnapped you.
Now imagine that your life is at stake, no matter what you do because this perp doesn't want to be identified by you?
In that critical moment, all your parents protective measures will come flooding into your mind and you will happily kiss the ground they walk on. For them though a great torture has come into their lives. You are lost to them. They can do nothing for you because you have deliberately removed yourself from the only people who care to stay awake all night every night, trying to find you.
So, it's a matter of perspective! The perspective you enjoy now is safe, secure and supportive, even when it bugs the paper off your walls. However, the alternatives can be-not always-dangerous.
Hi: There is an effect that happens with what I call closely guarded teens. Because I was a cloely guarded teen, even as a male, I know
this from my teen experience and from those of some of my peers.
I call it the slingshot effect. It happens when you have chafed under the sometimes overprotective guardianship parents are morally, legally and emotionally bound to provide to teens who, despite a very advanced system of information to inform them, have little or no practical experience living in the world. So what is the slingshot effect? Here is the best analogy I can think of:
Benny The Beagle watches the world from the big bay window of his owner's house. He is a well kept championship winning dog and is generally very happy except when it comes to wanting to be outside. He dreams of freedom. He hates being walked on the leash. When he is sitting in the window and other dogs come by he feels for all the world like a loser because he doesn't have the freedom to go where and when he wants.
One day the exterminator comes in and forgets to close the door properly. Bennie the Beagle sees his chance, dashes through the opening ans is out. He runs and runs and runs, sniffing everything he ever wondered about and generally having a great time. He is having such a good time running until he doesn't see the car until it's too late. The slingshot effect even affects animals.
Your parents have the enormous responsibity for you life, your safety, and your preparations for an independent life. Imagine the lifetime of torturous heartbreak they would feel if you became one of the 3,000 young people who are reported missing in America daily!
Now, imagine having the slingshot effect put you on a collision course with a psycho you met on the web!
Imagine that you decided to go meet this guy, who seemed very nice, very understanding online but when you met him he kidnapped you.
Now imagine that your life is at stake, no matter what you do because this perp doesn't want to be identified by you?
In that critical moment, all your parents protective measures will come flooding into your mind and you will happily kiss the ground they walk on. For them though a great torture has come into their lives. You are lost to them. They can do nothing for you because you have deliberately removed yourself from the only people who care to stay awake all night every night, trying to find you.
So, it's a matter of perspective! The perspective you enjoy now is safe, secure and supportive, even when it bugs the paper off your walls. However, the alternatives can be-not always-dangerous.
I will not acquiesce in on it. I think precise post. Specially the title attracted me to be familiar with the intact story.
Good post and this enter helped me alot in my college assignement. Thanks you seeking your information.
Nice dispatch and this mail helped me alot in my college assignement. Thank you seeking your information.
You have to express more your opinion to attract more readers, because just a video or plain text without any personal approach is not that valuable. But it is just form my point of view
Not sure where to post this but I wanted to ask if anyone has heard of National Clicks?
Can someone help me find it?
Overheard some co-workers talking about it all week but didn't have time to ask so I thought I would post it here to see if someone could help me out.
Seems to be getting alot of buzz right now.
Thanks
Sorry for my bad english. Thank you so much for your good post. Your post helped me in my college assignment, If you can provide me more details please email me.
Post a Comment